Never Too Real by Carmen Rita

Author:Carmen Rita [Rita, Carmen]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Kensington
Published: 2016-04-03T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 14

“Jesus Christ, I needed this so bad.” Luz’s curls looked wilted, like thirsty hydrangeas. She reclined almost fully in the restaurant booth, her head tipped back for a few seconds while the lanky server brought her a generously filled wineglass.

Gabi took her in. She loved Luz dearly and deeply admired her chutzpah, not to mention her doting, involved husband. But both married mamas found themselves together tonight for an urgent infusion of sistah amiga support.

“Okay. First, salud . . .” Gabi began. Luz raised her eyebrows, curious as to what her friend could be toasting to at this moment. “. . . to family: new and old.”

“Ha!” Luz brightened. “Salud to that.”

Both swigged down their wine like water, comfortable enough together to follow their gulps with heads bowed as if in prayer. A “Gracias a Dios” for the dulling, soothing effects of this powerfully calming substance.

“I just don’t know, Gabs . . .” Luz started off. Following the revelation of Luz’s newfound sister and father, one of the first calls she made was to Gabi, the rock-solid therapist friend. Her steel-trap of a mouth helped, too. Luz wasn’t ready to share this news of her newly discovered convict father and his rather “urban” teenager, who was now her sister.

Gabi leaned in. “Tell me: What’s happened since yesterday?” She quickly changed her priorities. “But wait . . . first, first, and most importantly, how are you doing?”

“G, I absolutely don’t know how to feel. I haven’t done much but cry and rage like a banshee to poor Chris . . . and then fend off texts from my desperate brother who’s going nuts in this position.” Luz paused for another swig. “I’m beating myself up at being so, so angry at my parents, my mother, even my father! I mean, dad, dad-father . . . the man who raised me!” She threw her head into both hands and let out a moan.

“Hon.” Gabi put her right hand onto Luz’s left forearm. “It’s a lot to take in. A lot. Give yourself a bit of time. Anger is a very natural response to all this. Shit, it’s a LOT.”

“Is it, though? Is it a lot? Does it change anything?!” Luz’s azure eyes flared. “I’ve never been angry like this at my mother or my father, for anything, annn-yyy-thing.” She drew out the word with her fingertips in a gesture handed down from her mother. Then she leaned back and reined it in. “This completely on-fire, pissed-off feeling is so foreign to me, yet, it’s like . . . my life’s been a lie—who I am is a lie. My identity! I’m fucking pissed!”

“Hon, I hear you, I hear you. But please remember, you are the sum of a lifetime’s worth of experiences, and nothing, no one, can alter that. No one can change who you’ve been for over thirty years.”

“But it’s not like I’m starting off being the daughter of a gangster to winning the lotto in life and being the daughter of an Ivy League brother—it’s the opposite! It’s switched.

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