Sexual Fluidity by Lisa M. Diamond

Sexual Fluidity by Lisa M. Diamond

Author:Lisa M. Diamond [Diamond, Lisa M.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Psychology, Human Sexuality, Social Psychology, Developmental, Lifespan Development
ISBN: 9780674026247
Google: b7GQvVx4UuwC
Amazon: 0674032268
Publisher: Harvard University Press
Published: 2008-02-14T16:00:00+00:00


When my heterosexual female friends say, “Oh, I wish I could be a lesbian, it’s so much easier, but I just love men so much,” I’m like, “That’s bull, you could have sex with women and enjoy it, I could have sex with men and enjoy it, but you choose not to because of the way you see yourself in society.” I think people place restrictions on themselves and they think, “Oh, I could never think that way,” be- cause they don’t want to identify as that. (age twenty-one, lesbian)

I think that most people have it in them to be attracted to both men and women, and I think people choose whether or not to admit that, explore it, or give in to those feelings. I think some people are more on the side of being gay and some people are more on the side of be- ing straight, but it’s my belief that it’s very rare that somebody is completely gay or completely straight, although I think that exists also. But I think it’s a choice to follow through with it, and I think everyone has that choice. (age twenty-six, unlabeled)

These diverse responses suggest that there is no single answer to the question of how choice affects women’s experiences of their same-sex sexuality, and especially changes in their sexual feelings over time. Some women feel that no matter what they choose to do, how they identify, or how they think about themselves, their attrac- tions remain unchanged. Women who acknowledge a strong capac- ity for fluidity, and who have had the opportunity to observe their own attractions ebb and flow over time, appear more open to the question of choice. Yet even for them, choice is limited to the con- scious decision about which attractions and opportunities to focus on and allow to flourish. As one woman put it, choice was the will- ingness to pursue one’s attractions.



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