She-Q: Why Women Should Mentor Men and Change the World by Takei Michele L.;

Author:Takei, Michele L.;
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: ABC-CLIO, LLC
Published: 2012-08-15T00:00:00+00:00

Men and Intimacy

The McGill Report on Male Intimacy8 was the largest study ever done on intimacy, surveying more than 5,000 men on every aspect of their emotional lives. It was based on a decade of research, and is well written, yet, again, few have ever heard about it.

Was this information just too threatening to the collective male psyche? Was this just one more thing to make sure that women didn’t learn too much about men? Today, anyone can just go to the Internet and discover a wealth of material on any subject. In the 1980s and 1990s, however, most of us depended on books, magazines, or television for our information. Most of us also had our copies of Men Are from Mars that served only to maintain the status quo.

McGill defines intimacy as what makes us feel close to each other. Intimacy, then, is time spent together involving a variety of interests and a depth of interpersonal exchange. Intimacy requires a disclosure of personal information. Women expect depth from a man equal to their own personal investment, but rarely feel that this depth is reflected back to them. McGill found that men strike out on all aspects of intimacy. Their relationships are typically one-dimensional in that they continue to relate to others in the same ways as they did in the past. They prefer to limit intimate talks to their specific interests and appear to be unwilling to broaden these areas. They are most uncomfortable with the skills required to deepen intimacy.

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