To Build a Dream: A Psychological SciFi Novel by Greg Hickey

Author:Greg Hickey [Hickey, Greg]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: anonymous
Published: 2023-10-24T16:00:00+00:00

23

All at once, Tim was surrounded by beeping monitors, stiff sheets, a mess of tubes and wires attached to his body. The walls and ceiling were the gray stone of the caves. But he was not in the caves anymore. The faint glows of yellowish light to his left and right marked the window and the doorway. He was in the hospital. For the first time in weeks, maybe months, he was certain of his surroundings. He still didn’t know who he was, but he knew what was happening. He had been dreaming, and now he was awake in the ICU. He had cancer. He had almost died several times—of cancer, of blood clots, air bubbles, infection, sepsis, organ failure. But he was not dead. Not yet. And for a moment, he allowed himself to believe for the first time in a long time that he might somehow stay alive through all of this. Maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t die after all.

At least not today, he told himself. Not today. I’m not going to fucking die today.

He would make it to the next morphine pulse, the next nursing shift change, the next cooking show, and then he would fall asleep and dream again and continue to figure things out. He and Triggs would find the right path through the caves. He would make it out. And if the doctor was right, he just might survive his disease, too. Already, he wished to return to the dream and see where this new tunnel led. But he was not tired. He was stuck, awake, in his hospital bed—at least for the time being. He might as well deal with it.

“I don’t know my name,” he told the first nurse who checked on him.

“Your name is Tim,” the nurse said. “Timothy Smit. I’m Miguel. Your oncologist is Dr. Ndukwe.” He rested a hand on Tim’s shoulder. “Don’t worry if you can’t remember. We ask to check on your status, but it’s not a quiz. Do you know where you are?”

“A hospital. I have cancer.” Behind Miguel, Triggs paced in front of the doorway. Tim ignored him.

“Yes,” Miguel said. “I’m sorry you had to learn that all over again. Being in the ICU for a long time messes with your head. Especially when you’re already struggling to get oxygen.”

Dr. Ndukwe confirmed Miguel’s assessment when she arrived. “ICU delirium is quite common. You probably won’t remember everything that happened during your hospitalization. But you will remember who you are and why you’re here. At the moment, we have the lung infection and sepsis under control, and your liver function is improving.”

Tim nodded. He remembered those complications. But there was another memory he couldn’t shake. “Someone was burning me,” he said. “Burning my heart.”

“You felt that?” Dr. Ndukwe’s eyes widened. “Oh, my god. You should have been anesthetized.”

“It didn’t hurt,” he said. “I smelled it.”

“I’m so sorry. You should not have been awake for that.” She shook her head. “A surgeon had to perform a procedure called a pericardial window to drain excess fluid from around your heart.

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